It Is Not A Choice

Why would anyone want to be LGBTQIAP+?

To be bullied in school?

To be exiled from their families?

To lose friendships?

To experience a hate crime?

For injustice?

To be judged?

…discriminated against?

To have people stare?

So that they can feel like an outcast?

To be told that who they are is a sin?

 To be treated like an alien?

To be shunned from their churches? Housing? Employment?

To have partial rights?

To be hated?

…looked down upon?

For inequality?

To get beat up in public restrooms?…murdered?

For life to feel unworthy of living?

…to end their lives?

It’s not a choice…

If it was, who would choose this?

Try to Understand

This is the reality for those who identify as transgender and for all those individuals in the LGBTQIAP+ community. I do not believe that our sexuality is a choice or something we can control. Whether at age 5 or 50+ how can someone choose to feel attracted to someone else? I know many do not agree with this, but who would choose a life of inequality? Who would choose to be shunned, bullied, and tormented by our white, Christian, heterosexual, male dominated society?

Former President Barack Obama Supports Equality

In 2010, President Barack Obama repealed the discriminatory policy Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, which prohibited homosexuals and lesbians from serving in the Armed Forces.

Government housing programs and services are now accessible to the LGBTQIAP+ community since 2012, when the law was passed against housing discrimination.

Obama also signed an Executive Order, preventing discrimination against job candidates or employees because they are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender in 2014.

Transgender Bathroom Rights

In 2014, in North Carolina, a 17-year-old student at Gloucester High School, Gavin Grimm, a transgender male, just wanted to feel like every other male in his school. Grimm transitioned to male and had legally changed his name and initially was allowed to use boys’ restroom but shortly lost this right, due to the concerns of individuals in the school’s community.

According toSupreme Court takes up transgender school bathroom case, the lawyers for the Alliance Defending Freedom, a non-profit legal organization, on behalf of Grimms, “sent a letter to the school board, stating that only a ‘minuscule percentage’ of individuals identify as transgender and that it was necessary for the school board to protect ‘other students’ privacy and free exercise rights,’ as well as ‘parents’ right to educate their children.’”

Grimm was forbidden to use the boy’s bathroom, so his lawyers filed a lawsuit against the Gloucester County School Board. “A federal appeals court ruled in Grimm’s favor, deferring to guidance put out by the Obama administration concerning Title IX, a federal law that bans sex discrimination in schools. That guidance interprets “sex discrimination” to include claims based on gender identity.” This passing Friday, October 28, 2016, Grimm stated, “I will do everything I can to make sure that other transgender students don’t have to go through the same experience,” according to 

According to an article from CNN, LGBT Rights Milestones Fast Facts, “In 2015, Same-sex marriage was legalized nationwide and it is a constitutional right for the LGBTQIAP+ community.” This progression is noted, but we still have work to do, because every human deserves equality.

It is important for everyone to remember that no one deserves to feel like they are inhuman. We are not talking about murderers, rapists, or child molesters; these are human beings that just want to live as normally as they possibly can. Imagine being born female, and feeling like you should be a different gender? The last thing you would want to think about is where you pee.

Of course, the questions of safety has been brought to light. Now, people are worrying about individuals portraying themselves as a different gender, using the bathroom, in hopes of videotaping, peeping, sexually assaulting, raping, or kidnapping someone. This definitely poses a major threat to the safety of all individuals. Although this is a meaningful argument, this can happen now in gender specific bathrooms. If the argument is about playing dress up, this can happen even without considering transgender men and women’s rights, so why are we just considering this now? This seems like an excuse or a reason make it more difficult for transgender individuals to feel a sense of normalcy and to continue the stereotype that if you are transgender, you must be a predator, which is not fair.

Equality has no Boundaries 

As a heterosexual, black, female, I know what discrimination feels like. I feel obligated to stand up and advocate for all those around me who have also experienced discrimination. I can recall a time when African-Americans were not able to drink from public water fountains, sit in the front of a public bus, use public restrooms, or do anything that white people could do because we were considered unsanitary, less than human, and different. 

To those of you with privilege, advocate for those without. To those of you who are a part of the LGBTQIAP+ community, continue to advocate for yourselves. Never become silent! LADYHOOD journey, LLC advocates for EQUAL RIGHTS FOR ALL! All are welcome in this safe-space. 

LGBTQIAP+ (check this out to learn more about the LGBT+ community and how you can become an advocate for equal rights)

18 thoughts on “It Is Not A Choice

  1. I love this post! Absolutely spoken my mind!
    I, too have some poems touching upon this same topic, and it is so good to see you showing your support🌸
    We have to speak up, we have to bring about a change

      1. Thank you for sharing and of course!!!!!!!! I am all about equality and advocacy! Can’t wait to read

  2. Thank you for sharing this. I hope this message can be shared over and over. It’s so important that people actually understand what equality means, and like you said… not just tolerate us. Thank you ❤✌

    1. Thank you for reading and you are most welcome. I wish I could change the mind of every single homophobic person. One step at a time.

    1. Thank you so much for sharing the purpose of my blog and for valuing my post “It’s not a choice…” 😆🤗😄😙😁😊

  3. Thanks for linking me! This is a phenomenal blog post. I’m really glad you’re talking about Gavin-and if you need further information on cases like his, there’s one at my (I’m ashamed to say) former high school, but this time about a little girl. Highland Local School District (Marengo, Ohio) just lost their case demanding they be allowed to keep her out of girls’ restrooms. Obviously the judge was phenomenal (having been quoted as saying “let her be the little girl she is”) but another case of people not understanding basic human rights and identities. Great work!

    1. Thank you Anthromichelle for checking out my post and I gratefully appreciate your comment. I believe that there is so much progress to be made. That situation in Marengo, Ohio is one of many and I feel it is everyone’s job to advocate for injustices. I am just doing my part.

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